Almost a Hundred Pounds of Weight Loss.

Sleeve Gastrectomy Weight Loss

Almost 100 lbs of weight lost. From my highest weight till about a week ago. The bulk of the loss, of course, has been this year. In January, when I decided to get the sleeve gastrectomy, I was 239 lbs. I think the morning of the surgery (on April 7th), I was 217 lbs (-22 lbs in the 3 months it took to get clearance).

I've been stuck around 162 +/- 2lbs for a couple of weeks, which prompted me to look into adding *gulp* exercise to my life. Egads. I'm also starting to feel like I have that slumped "extreme-weight-loss" look. You know what I mean? After years of carrying so much extra weight, your posture gets all messed up.

Me.

The saggy skin doesn't bother me too much, but if there's something that I can sorta do about it, I feel like I should. So, I need to bulk up a bit to fill in the skin with something other than fat. OH SWEET LORD, I'm totally lying, I forgot about the turkey neck. Oh gahd... the turkey neck...

It's so annoying because that wrinkly bastard is what's aging me. YOU SONOFABITCH TURKEY NECK!!! YOU DIE! YOU DIE AND YOU GO TO HELL!!!!!

I Did It! I Did It!

For some reason, I haven't blogged since March... and there's SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT. I had the Sleeve Gastrectomy on April 14, 2014 and it was THE BEST DECISION I'VE MADE regarding my health.

While the weight loss is awesome, the removal of the hunger hormone has made a world of difference in my life. At this point, I am no longer obsessed with food. Like, I can be in the same room with a piece of chocolate cake and NOT be thinking about all the naughty things my body wants to do to it.

Life has changed. It is soooo good. :)

As a teaser, here are some side-by-side photos of me at my heaviest, pre-op, and one taken a couple weeks ago. I plan to fill up this blog with info about the process, the food I bought to get me through the phases, tools for success, and stuff on dealing with Lupus throughout all of it. I have a girlfriend in NYC, whom I adore, who is planning on getting the sleeve done too. I hope that this site will serve as a go-to guide for her.

FBC's Bariatric Pre-Op Liquid Diet for Weenies

I've been cleared for the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy and am on day 3 of the pre-op liquid diet. It ain't so bad really. The reason I'm able to say that is because I've adjusted the diet to fit my needs (that's how I roll, behbeh). I knew I wasn't going to be very successful if I stuck to the 3 protein shakes, I small meal under 300 calories, and 1 tiny snack under 200 calories. I feared for the life of my sweet chihuahua and her tasty, wee appetizer-like legs.

The way I saw it was if I stuck to the whole foods under 500 calories and the rest in shakes, I'd be okay. Thankfully my doc was peachy with the way I wanted to mix it up (pft ft ft, get it? "Mix" it up... [I'm on a drastically reduced meal plan, we ain't gonna strike gold here folks]). So, might I present to you...

Fat Brown Chick's Sleeve Pre-Op Liquid Diet for Weenies

Breakfast:	Calories	Protein
1/2 Cup Egg Whites	63	13
1 Medium Bell Pepper (1/3 each of Red, Orange, Yellow)	24	1
1/4 Cup Medium Onion	12	0
1 Cup Spinach	7	1
1/2 Protein Shake (OhYeah!)	110	17.5
Breakfast Subtotal	216	32.5
Snack:
1/2 Protein Shake (OhYeah!)	110	17.5
Lunch:
2 Cups Romaine Lettuce	16	1
1.5 Oz Chicken Breast	70	13
.5 Oz Fat Free Crumbled Feta (from Trader Joe's)	17.5	2.5
1/2 Medium Tomato	11	.5
1/2 6" Cucumber w/o Skin	9	0
1/2 5.5"/2 Oz Carrot (Shredded)	10	0
1 Tablespoon Kraft Zesty Italian Dressing (Fat Free)	7.5	0
Lunch Subtotal	141	17
Snack:
1 Protein Shake (Jay Robb's Egg White Protein)	120	24
Dinner:
See Lunch	141	17
1/2 Protein Shake (OhYeah!)	110	17.5
Dinner Subtotal	251	34.5
Dessert/ Late Night Snack:
1 Cup Pre-Packaged Red Grapefruit (Costco)	110	1
1/2 Protein Shake (OhYeah!)	110	17.5
Total	1058	144

Since I'm lactose intolerant, I have to stick with lactose-free protein shakes. OhYeah! ready-to-drink shakes pack in 35 grams of protein and are pretty decent tasting. They come in chocolate, vanilla creme, strawberries & creme, cookies & creme, and bananas & creme. What I like about these is that I feel like I'm being decadent when I drink them. They remind me of having the naughty full-fat chocolate milk you got when your were a kid.

The other lactose-free protein powder I have is Jay Robb Egg White Protein. It comes in chocolate, strawberry, vanilla, and unflavored and they're all 24 grams of protein. I haven't tried the unflavored one, but the first three are pretty good. They're kinda expensive, but I'm scared of having some weird milk allergy, so I started off with these. If you're on your way to a bariatric surgery, you can get the sample kit through the Jay Robb website. But really, just head down to the Vitamin Shoppe and they have the packets there too.

A fit friend of mine turned me on to TrueNutrition.com. It's a cool site because you can choose your flavors and sweeteners in addition to your protein. They've got whey, egg, rice, beef, pea, and hemp protein (I'm sure there are others). I bought some of the beef protein to add to my chicken and beef broth. I was hoping to make a kick-ass horchata protein shake with the vanilla rice w/splenda one that I got. No dice. Not. Good.

On a not-really related note, is it weird that I feel like these nutrition websites are judging me for not being healthy enough? Like they're being run by super fit, snobby muscle-heads who just know that my IP address is that of a fat person. Don't even get me started about walking into the Vitamin Shoppe...

What're you doing here? Like, ohmygah... *hair flip*

My Fitness Pal & Fitbit.

Went to another WLS surgery meeting last night and the nutritionist mentioned journaling/tracking our food. I've been a member of My Fitness Pal for eons, but she also brought up SparkPeople. I have some friends who have used the site and thought to myself, "Why the hell not?"

My god man. Dude (yah, I called you a dude), talk about a website for people with short attention spans. There were SO MANY THINGS going on with that site, I got a headache within minutes. I started an account and when I attempted to link all of my gadgets, there were issues. I already have enough issues. Pft. It was having problems linking to my Withings scale (*coughfirstworldproblemscough*). I ended up just cancelling my account and returning to the less-glitchy MFP.

So, I'm on MFP. Find me. Friend me. Username, strangely enough, is FatBrownChick: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/fatbrownchick.

I'm also on Fitbit, which is an AWESOME site because, like MFP, it consolidates all of your data and you can track your sleep and all kinds of kooky things. You also get to trash talk your friends (which is really what it's all about). While you're at it, friend me on Fitbit too!!

Just joined a Fitbit Sleeve group, so if you're planning on gett'n it done and have a fitbit, come tell me about yourself and befriend me so I can make fun of how little you're walking. :D

6-Month Sentence & The Return of Lucy Liu.

A couple years ago I toyed with the idea of getting a sleeve gastrectomy, which I eventually decided against. During that time, though, I met up with a terrifying (yet titillating) nutritionist who I like to refer to as Lucy Liu. Or is it whom... who, whom I like to... grammar, ye are a finicky she-beast.

Anywhoosies, I decided that I needed to get the surgery done and today returned to the Weight Loss Center. I'm super excited to get 'er done and everything was going along swimmingly until I found out that my insurance needs proof of a 6-month medically supervised diet. SAY WHAAAAT? Now don't get me wrong, I'm pleased as punch that my insurance actually covers the procedure, however, it just seems so uncool that they have this caveat in place.

I mean seriously, how many "ladies of a certain age," such as myself, get to this point without having tried a ZILLION different diets/potions/lifestyle changes/hypnotists? I'd say less than 1%. So that means that the insurance company is making the rest of us wait an additional 6 months for, really, nothing. During that time, our type are not like, "Whoa! I'm really glad I had this time to lose this 5 lbs, be super frustrated, and potentially fuck my body up more with all the pleasantries that come with being morbidly obese."

And what if, in the meantime, I end up stroke'n out, dying of sleep apnea, my heart explodes, or a zillion other things? I'm fucked. And if we lose our insurance before I finish the 6 months? I'm fucked. Yes, I know that no one did this to me, I'm the one who made the decision to go to Carl's Jr instead of Salads R Us; but, fuck. Come on insurance. Why you gotta dangle the chocolate carrot in front of a sista' like that?!!!!

Hubby said he would call on Monday and see if there's any way around the 6-month policy. I suggested that he give up his body for them to use with it as they will. I'm not sure he's going to go along with that plan, but he needs to suck it up and give 'em a little sugar.

But I digress. So yah, the sleeve gastric bypass. Gonna do it. "What it the hell is a sleeve gastrectomy?!" you might ask. Well let me tell you. It's a surgery whereby 85% of your stomach is removed, basically giving your a "sleeve" type stomach the shape of a banana. It's what they call a "restrictive" surgery: it limits the amount of food you can process and doesn't move around or connect any other body parts.

It's great because it removes the portion of the stomach that secretes Ghrelin - a hormone that is responsible for appetite and hunger. I think that they forgot the "m" when they were naming it, 'cause it does seem to me that g[h]remlins are a part of this conspiracy to keep me fat. Little fuckers.

Learn more about the surgery and support forums at ObesityHelp.com. There's a lot of cool info there. I also thought this video from the Mayo Clinic was kinda cool:

Transcript: In a sleeve gastrectomy, part of the stomach is separated and removed from the body. The remaining section of the stomach is formed into a tube-like structure. This smaller stomach cannot hold as much food. It also produces less of the appetite-regulating hormone ghrelin, which may lessen your desire to eat. However, sleeve gastrectomy does not affect the absorption of calories and nutrients in the intestines.

So I'm going to let these doctors cut up my body so I won't die early. The scariest part of the whole procedure, though, is having to meet up next week with the nutritionist I lovingly refer to as Lucy Lui. Yes, she's still there!!! And I'm sure she's as terrifying as ever. She's going to be the one who is responsible for my 6-month sentence. Sweet mother of gahd.

The Thinning.

I can already feel the weight coming off. I've been sticking to a plant-based diet and limiting my carb intake.

I wonder how many people start various surgery programs out there, start losing weight naturally, and decide NOT to continue with the surgery. The thought of cutting off a major part of my stomach freaks me out. There's so much about the human body that we don't know about: I'm scared that it'll affect me (in a bad way) down the road.

Lucy Liu.

The program I'm going through for the sleeve is awesome, but right now I'm not love'n the Dietitian. Okay no, that's a lie. She's frick'n awesome, but she's got balls of steel and is pretty much unbendable when it comes to what I should be eating. She reminds me of Lucy Liu in Charlie's Angels, except a million times meaner.

So, part of the pre-surgery protocol is that you start eating the way you will be post-surgery (albeit in larger portions). What sucks big time is that right now I'm limiting my carbs (you can't have bread, tortillas, pasta for 6 months after your surgery). I'm so fucking tired right now. I feel like I'm going through ketosis fatigue.

The ketosis symptoms associated with the benign dietary ketosis caused by eating a low carb, ketogenic diet are not dangerous. They may differ for each individual, with the most common symptoms being:

• Ketosis breath, which has a fruity odor, and the person in deep ketosis may feel a sort of slight burning in the nose and a slight smell of ammonia. I haven't noticed this yet, but fruity and ammonia really aren't synonymous to me.
• Dry mouth, which is alleviated by drinking more water. Totes.
• A slight headache at first which goes away in a few days. Yeppers.
• In the first week of beginning a ketogenic diet, most people experience frequent urination followed by fatigue, as the kidneys release extraneous water stores. Minerals such as sodium, magnesium and potassium are also lost with excreted urine, and it is the mineral loss that causes the fatigue. This can be offset by eating more salt, drinking more fluids, and increasing the intake of magnesium and potassium containing foods. (Dairy foods and avocados are high in potassium, and you can drink broth for more sodium.)
• Ketone bodies become detectable in the urine. Ketone bodies are leftover fragment molecules created by the natural process of burning body fat for fuel. Diabetics and low carb dieters use a product called Ketostix to check for the presence of ketones in the urine, although each group does this for different reasons. If ketones are present, the stick turns purple.
• After several days of ketosis, there may be a sense of euphoria, or an experience of high energy. Lies. Well, it hasn't been several days yet. No euphoria. I just want to crawl into bed and sleep. Ahhhh... sleep.
• Very clear thinking, and a lack of "brain fog".  Dude, seriously? You're on crack. My brain is angry, hurty, and hates Lucy Liu.

- Ketogenic Diet Resource

I mean, sure, I probably eat more carbs than a small family of Italians, but this all just seems soooo unfaaaaaiiiir. *tossing self to floor* I keep passing restaurants and saying, "Welp, I guess I'll never eat there again." Then I catch myself weighing my decision. Krispy Kreme or living a longer life. I'm not going to lie to you, it's not an easy choice.

Food has become my long-time lover. It's been there for me in times of sorrow, happiness, laughter. It's a part of my family. Fuck. This is going to be hard.